26th March

The nurse manager at the hospice phoned me today and said Vicky was less well and sleeping even more.  She is able to eat tiny amounts and take some tablets and still has the syringe pump, and they have promised to telephone if she deteriorates further.  They are having no visitors to the hospice at all, except for exceptional circumstances, and if I am allowed to go any time I will take my nightie and toothbrush so that I am not coming and going. 
I feel up and down in my response to the Corona Virus.  Part of me feels it is teaching me to Be rather than Do all the time, which I have always struggled with, and I know I am fortunate to have enough food and a  nice home.  I am obviously pleased that pollution is reduced to the planet.  Other times I feel anxious about more vulnerable people, and the economy and most of all not being with Vicky. 
I have signed up for NHS nursing for the future; it will be strange wearing a uniform again.
I am now reading Big Sky by Kate Atkinson, and every page is filled with juicy observations. 
I have cleared out a few cupboards, and am using all my children's old school reports to light the wood burner in the evenings.  The dancing in the road is not going well.  It was only me and one other woman this morning.  The allotment has never been so weed-free.
I'm such a chatterer I miss people.  I also miss swimming and both are like food and water to me.
A small drop of whisky in the evening is a great comfort.  I highly recommend it.
Josie